If i come over, it means nothing
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
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I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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