So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
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you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
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I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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