Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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