I'm gonna have a badass scar
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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