seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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