I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize