your parents love me but you hate me
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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