Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize