I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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