omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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