I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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