Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize