If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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