Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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