i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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