so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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