Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Randomize