Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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