I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize