Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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