I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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