I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize