just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
it's like iHOP with fire
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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