Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize