you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
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He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
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Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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