its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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