I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
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Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
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I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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