She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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