Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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