He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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