kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize