So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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