smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
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There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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