So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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