Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
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How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
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so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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