one two three fourrrrnication!
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
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I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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