sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
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