i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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