New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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