The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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