Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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