Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Randomize