bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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