my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
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i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
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the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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