Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Randomize