so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize