I hate your face
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't watch enough power rangers
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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