i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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