we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize