I didn't shave. On purpose
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
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